20 Gambling Jokes to Make you Laugh

Having a hard day at the casino? Is lady luck not by your side today? Don’t fret! Laughter is the best medicine. According to scientists, a good laugh relaxes your body, burns calories, boosts your immune system, releases endorphins, and even protects your heart!

Casino games can be stressful and frustrating whether you play in a land-based casino or online with a live dealer especially if you are losing. Knowing these gambling jokes will help you when you are feeling down. After all, a little bit of humor and laughter can lift your spirits right back up! Why not check out our favourite gambling jokes that are sure to make you laugh whether you are playing at a brick-and-mortar casino or an online casino of your choosing from our trusted casino reviews.

Best Casino Jokes for Blackjack Players

Playing blackjack is simple enough but it can sure be frustrating especially when you play for real money. A great way of relieving some stress is to crack a fun joke. With these one liners, while your dealer can be the dealer of cards, you can be the dealer of humour!

• What’s the difference between a man praying in a church and a man praying at a blackjack table? The man at the blackjack table means it.
• What did the yoga instructor say when the blackjack dealer asked him if he wanted another card? “Namaste.”
• -What company never loses at blackjack, you ask? Forever 21.”

Best Casino Jokes for Poker Players

When playing poker, you are probably focused and very serious. Maybe you don’t talk too much because the game is so tense. Here we have a couple of jokes about gambling to break the ice with your opponents and have some fun!

• -What’s the difference between online poker and live poker? You can cry after a bad beat online, and no one will laugh at you.-My wife challenged me to a game of strip poker, but then I realized she just wanted to do the laundry. So, I folded.-Everyone said that Martin would be a wonderful maid … all he does is fold!

  -You know who an easy opponent is? Santa Claus, because he always checks twice.

  -What do you call a professional poker player who broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.

Best Casino Jokes About Roulette

Whether you are in a brick-and-mortar casino or in a safe online casino, playing roulette can be fun and simple, but losing is not really fun! If the roulette wheel isn’t spinning right round for you, you can spin the conversation right round for sure with our favourite roulette jokes!

• -I was in a casino last night and had a few spins on the roulette wheel… Before the manager told me to get off.-The roulette dealer had a unique personality. He had a different spin on everything.

Funny Casino Video

We are sure you will enjoy this hilarious video as much as you will enjoy bonuses and no-deposit bonuses from our favourite casinos.

Funny Gambling Jokes and Puns

Here we have compiled some puns and jokes about gambling you can use in any situation in a casino. With these hilarious jokes, you are sure to be the funniest person in the room! These gambling jokes will help you keep your spirits up and lighten the mood on your way to the jackpot.

• -A man goes into a casino and sees a sign that says, “If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER.” He thinks about it for a moment and then dials the number. When someone picks up, he says, “I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What should I do?”-My girlfriend says she’s going to leave me because I have a gambling problem. But I think she’s bluffing.-My shovel had a gambling addiction. I had to stop him before he dug himself a deeper hole.

  -A guy with a gambling addiction walks into a butchers and says to the butcher, “I bet you $500 you can’t get the meat down from the top shelf without a ladder”
  The butcher says, “I can’t take that bet, the steaks are too high.”

  -People say gambling ruins lives, but it brought our family closer. We now live in a one bedroom unit.

  -Marriage is like a deck of cards: all you need at first is two hearts and a diamond; but in the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.

  -I got asked to leave the casino the other night. They said I had a chip on my shoulder.

  -What did the dealer say to the deck of cards? I can’t deal with you anymore.

Viva Las Vegas!

Las Vegas is famous for its glamourous atmosphere and engaging games. Especially with the huge selection of progressive jackpots, it is the perfect place for gamblers to take a break from online gambling and enjoy a land-based casino resort. Of course we have a joke about Las Vegas!

Las Vegas Religion

In Las Vegas, worshippers can put in casino chips when the collection plate is passed around. Chips from all the city’s churches are then bundled together and taken to a Franciscan monastery outside the city for sorting.

Then they are shipped back to the various casinos for cashing in.

This is done by the chip monks

Going to The Dogs

A man walks into a bar and notices a poker game at the far table. Upon taking a closer look he sees a dog sitting at the table. This peaks his curiosity and he walks closer and sees cards and chips in front of the dog.

Then the next hand is dealt and cards are dealt to the dog. The dog acts in turn with all the other players, calling, raising, and discarding, everything the other human players were doing. However, none of the other players seem to pay any mind to the fact that they are playing with a dog, they just treat him like any other player. Finally, the man can no longer hold his tongue, so between hands, he quietly says to one of the players, “I can’t believe that dog is playing poker, he must be the smartest dog in the world!”

The player smiles and says, “He isn’t that smart. Every time he gets a good hand, he wags his tail.”

With that being said we reach the end of our blog post. We hope you enjoyed these jokes about gambling as much as we did! Why not try them out? Before you go, make sure to check the legal age requirements of US casinos. You can also try your hand at some free fun from social casinos to get the hang of things and read all about how to protect yourself from cheaters.